1. |
Self-
02:35
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I'll shake the apples from my family tree.
So when the autumn comes to take the leaves
We'll write history books from memory
that we shared and will forget.
No, I don't remember 2012
But I heard the world would turn to hell.
And compared to that, well I'm doing well.
So I pray to God it really did.
Well they always ask you not to leave.
And I am as they remember me.
So when all my friends forget my name
No, I won't come back and be the same.
No, I won't come back and be the same.
And I'm gonna be my self again.
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2. |
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Fuck.
I was an existential criminal, so innocently cynical.
Ignorant as fuck but a proud individual.
Originally meant to live a God-damned miracle
Might’ve been metaphysical, but I think it was medical.
Testing my hypothesis, never finding a theory.
Emulating animals and mental aboriginals
A miserable fuck but a loud Tao mystical
An enemy of ritual traditionally integral to
Biblical originals, but literally pitiful.
Too impatient for outpatient. Paging Dr. Leary.
Did you lose yourself? It’s always in the last place that you’d check.
I might find myself by retracing my steps, but…
I don’t remember how I forgot myself.
I don’t remember, I don’t remember 2012.
I don’t remember how I forgot myself.
I don’t remember, I don’t remember 2012.
I don’t remember 2012. I don’t remember,
wow, the whole year’s a blur.
I think I bought into the comedy and brought a lot of oddity
An odyssey I thought to be consider a commodity
And not until anomaly abolished my monotony
Did I applaud autonomy and modify a lot of me.
I’ll escape this reality, be the next Houdini.
Glory be Satori but its hallucinatory and it’s sure to be a story I can tell in purgatory
I said, once I’ve lost it can there be a Mahaprajnaparamita?
Did you lose yourself? It’s always in the last place that you’d check. I might find myself by retracing my steps.
I don’t remember how I forgot myself.
I don’t remember, I don’t remember 2012.
I don’t remember how I forgot myself.
I don’t remember, I don’t remember 2012.
I heard the world would turn to hell. Compared to that, I’m doing well.
I don’t remember how I forgot myself.
I don’t remember, I don’t remember 2012.
I don’t remember how I forgot myself.
I don’t remember, I don’t remember 2012.
I don’t remember 2012. I don’t remember 2012.
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3. |
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What if the wind caught up with me, started to change when I did,
Would I blow out like a light? Or like a kite fly away?
What if the fear of darkness gave way to the fear of color?
Would you live in black & white or rest your eyes through the day?
And if dreams can come true, what does that say about nightmares?
I’ll stay awake tonight.
Cry my name remind my brain of my identity.
I’m not gonna listen, I’m not my volition, I’m
Sha Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Free Will!
Am I to blame for riding this train right by my destiny?
Ah, prove I can crack, Ah, loose from track, ah
Sha Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Free Will!
Rolling my third eye into the back
Of my head and squinting through the black
Saw no center, saw not where it lead
It’s times like this that make me wish that-
I wished that I were dead. I don’t wish I were dead,
but SOMEBODY’S got to go!
I wanna make my murder look like a suicide.
But they’ll all know the body’s mine.
I wanna go anonymous to identify.
But they’ll all know the body’s mine.
Divide by 1 and find I’m one less than the one I was.
So how many people am I? Now that I keep ‘em in my
Sha Na Na Na Na Na Memory, Still I
Check in the mirror to see how I look.
I look different in different ways.
Ah you do the math, ah, who’s looking back, ah
Sha Na Na Na Na Na Na Na THAT’S NOT ME.
Carving my initials in the back
Of my hand in case of losing track
I forgot, remember to forgive?
It’s times like this that make me wish that-
I wished that I could live. I don’t wish I could live but
SOMEBODY’S got to stay!
I wanna make my murder look like a suicide.
But they’ll all know the body’s mine.
I wanna go anonymous to identify.
But they’ll all know the body’s mine.
And if dreams can come true, what does that say about nightmares? I’ll stay awake tonight.
I wanna make my murder look like a suicide.
But they’ll all know the body’s mine.
I wanna go anonymous to identify.
But they’ll all know the body’s mine.
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4. |
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You’re trying to replace yourself, you’re trying to replace yourself.
You’re trying to replace yourself, you’re trying to replace yourself.
You’re trying to replace yourself, you’re trying to replace yourself.
You’re trying to replace yourself, you’re trying to replace yourself.
Carving out a fact from a reckoning,
beckoning you back, skin sagging off its skeleton
Levitating off the ground is another man wearing your face.
All the other false identities,
remedies or enemies to mitigate your memories
Shuddered at what they found when they stripped away the grace.
Eulogy or biography, I’m who I oughtta be, and that is God to me.
So, my God, what’s wrong with me? If who I wanna be might
Never Never Never. Never Never Never.
Never Never Never. NEVER NEVER!
You’ll never take me alive, baby. You’ll never take me alive.
You’ll never take me, you’ll never take me, you better pray that I die.
You’ll never take me alive, baby. You’ll never take me alive.
You’ll never take me, you’ll never take me, and no you’re never gon’ find.
Somebody to replace yourself! Somebody to replace yourself!
Somebody to replace yourself! Somebody to replace yourself!
Damn, I thought you’re not your imposter.
You’re so sure you’re not gonna get caught
dead in your own skin, but you didn’t choose what you were born in.
And another man in your repertoire,
ready in your head and fed upon your memoirs
Still the same rules apply from the birthday to the mourning.
What you feel and what you do; are those things really you? And if not, then what is?
Oh my God, what’s wrong with you? And I’m still asking who that is.
Never Never Never. Never Never Never. Never Never Never. NEVER NEVER!
(This is not enough! This is not enough to prove it yet!
No, I need to hit the bottom!
This is not enough! This is not enough to prove it yet!
No, I need to hit the bottom!)
You’ll never take me alive, baby. You’ll never take me alive.
You’ll never take me, you’ll never take me, you better pray that I die.
You’ll never take me alive, baby. You’ll never take me alive.
You’ll never take me, you’ll never take me, and no you’re never gon’ find.
Somebody to replace yourself! Somebody to replace yourself!
Somebody to replace yourself! Somebody to replace yourself!
Somebody to replace yourself! Somebody to replace yourself!
Somebody to replace yourself! Somebody to replace yourself!
Hey!
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5. |
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Why, I can’t see, that I am the “me” that I was born into.
And what’s the source of you?
In your head, in your head, in your head.
And yet you believe it’s true.
Well you do. Like you knew anything ever.
Never trust in yourself or anyone else. We’ve always all been wrong.
And we built these walls strong.
Even I might define, won’t deny that I’m trying while my
eyes do defy and belie quiet liars as I
Say what I say any way I may be saying it but
I’VE BEEN WRONG BEFORE!
You can n-n-n-n-never know...
You can break a shovel when you break new ground. You dig dirt up when you dig deep down.
You should know better than that by now. It’s not profound to know that you can never know.
So don’t you forget that all you project is just to protect you from
the void within the form.
Yes or no isn’t null. Yes it is. No. I don’t know.
Yes or no? Isn’t it a silly question? Ask it anyway.
‘Cause what we are is what we are not. אֶהְיֶה אֲשֶׁר אֶהְיֶה
What myths must make us man?
What is “is?” What is not? What is “what?”
What’s up, party people? What?
What I wonder? Why I’m not “whatever.”
What the fuck? ‘Cause
You can n-n-n-n-never know...
You can break a shovel when you break new ground. You dig dirt up when you dig deep down.
You should know better than that by now. It’s not profound to know that you can never know.
I noticed that the sunshine is a gaslight.
I’m hoping that this one might be my past life.
My Lord, I know enough to get my facts right.
And that’s good enough for me.
And everything and everyone will die soon,
and we’ll have nothing left for us to lie to.
No matter what we seek you’ll never find truth,
and that’s good enough for me.
So give me that Old Time Religion. Gimme that Old Time Religion.
Give me that Old Time Religion. It’s Good Enough For Me.
You can n-n-n-n-never know...
You can break a shovel when you break new ground. You dig dirt up when you dig deep down.
You should know better than that by now. It’s not profound to know that you can never know.
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6. |
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My heart was stolen by a blind pickpocket in the
deep city streets in the summer of 2012 and I never even saw her face.
My dreams were shattered like a stained glass window
Jesus in Pieces! I believe I threw a brick right through Him,
but my memory could not be saved.
It just seems unlikely that it’s me who was to blame.
So I bookmark my DSM ‘cause I need to remember my place.
This is not enough! This is not enough to prove it yet!
No, I need to hit the bottom.
This is not enough! This is not enough to prove it yet!
No, I need to hit the bottom.
Gotta get to the bottom of this. Gotta get to the bottom of this.
Gotta get to the bottom of this.Take you with me.
My soul was crushed like a tall boy underneath the
boots on the curb and I’m still picking up my molars
and putting them back in my face.
My name was soiled by a last call spill with a
backwash swill and the blackout killed me
sober on impact from a fall from grace.
Take the road on higher ground and tell me “don’t look down!
You’ll fall and break your back.”
But that just reminds me how there’s more to be found
Beneath the black.
This is not enough! This is not enough to prove it yet!
No, I need to hit the bottom.
This is not enough! This is not enough to prove it yet!
No, I need to hit the bottom.
Gotta get to the bottom of this.
Gotta get to the bottom of this.
Gotta get to the bottom of this.
Take you with me.
Bottle, well, or barrel? All are empty.
Dug, or drank, or poured it out.
When too much is not enough there’s plenty
more where that came from around.
Looking up we see the point of entry,
between where we are and we’ve been.
Looking down I could say Heaven sent me.
Hand me my shovel. I’m going in.
Gotta get to the bottom of this.
If it it kills me.
This is not enough! This is not enough to prove it yet!
No, I need to hit the bottom.
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7. |
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When did I become afraid of the dark? Are my
eyeballs just yet to adjust to seeing the light?
The room I’m in is still the same, the shadows didn’t rearrange it,
no the only thing that’s changed is how I see at night.
I fumble for the switch and strap on infrareds and wish for
sunshine when the morning’s somewhere else.
But I can’t change what time it is or dilate my irises.
Only what I look at, and I’m looking at myself.
I am not the sunshine, I am not the moon at night.
Well who else could I be when I can’t hardly see.
I am not the sunshine, I am not the moon at night.
I’m no one if I’m NowHere in between.
When did I become afraid of the dark? Was it
when I left the cave and swore I’d never go back?
If we can’t see each other then there’s no more use for hiding
I’ve decided I’ll abide it, why deny the color black?
I’m not a flower, not a solar-powered calculator.
Damn my eyes for seeing what’s not there.
I’ll trade in vision for a practiced intuition
Till my fears come to fruition I’m not scared.
I am not the sunshine, I am not the moon at night.
Well who else could I be when I can’t hardly see.
I am not the sunshine, I am not the moon at night.
I’m no one if I’m NowHere in between.
The future must know where you’ve been,
the past predicts the state you’re in.
The present did and will not last, is. isn’t. was. Have. hasn’t. has.
All that I ask is, keep those empty frames.
If nobody’s in them, then no one is to blame.
For your self-portraits, sign another name.
Who can I be now, if I’ll never be the same?
I will be my sunshine, I will be my moon at night
Well who else could I be, if I can’t fucking see?
I will be my sunshine, I will be my moon at night
I’m nowhere now here’s no one now to be.
And if dreams can come true, what does that say about nightmares?
I’ll stay awake tonight.
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8. |
-ish
02:15
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Well if winter comes and takes my life
Will it be the death I had in mind?
Or will I be captured in the ice
to preserve the way I died?
Well at 27 will I see?
That I was born to be the man I'll be.
And if I change my self can I still stay me?
Or did I just change my mind?
I am a point in time and space.
And I am the truths that I create.
And so where my matter takes its stand.
No it doesn't matter who I am.
No it doesn't matter who I am.
And I'm gonna be
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Will Wood
Exᴄʟᴜsɪᴠᴇ ᴄᴏɴᴛᴇɴᴛ ᴀᴠᴀɪʟᴀʙʟᴇ ᴀᴛ:
Patreon.com/therealwillwood
NEW ALBUM "IN CASE I DIE" OUT NOW!
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